Chicken...

This post is dedicated to the CHICKEN.

Why? Because I've been up since 4:30 am (Why up so early on a weekend you ask? Well, I'm a human soother to our infant + snoring spouse + can't sleep because I know that the contents of our fridge, pantry and freezer need addressing and the grocery store down the block opens at 6 am - may as well beat the rush).

A) Going grocery shopping at 6 am on a Saturday is good. It's not busy and you'll find 90% of the stuff you need in stock. Going grocery shopping at 6 am is not good if you realize 9 hours later you've left the 4 KILOGRAM BOX OF FROZEN CHICKEN BREASTS on the basement floor beside the freezer. Oops.

What does a sleep deprived human soother do, exactly, with 4 kilos, or 8.8184905 pounds, of partially frozen chicken breasts (besides putting a few coins in the swear jar and thinking, serves you right for considering blogging how efficient and fabulous you were today, even though you've been up since 4:30 am)? You cook em. That's what (see end of post for more).

B) My husband laughed at me while I was trying to walk through the same grocery store parking lot in high heels a couple of years ago (no, we do not forget). We were on our way to a family photo appointment and I was trying to look the part. You know, competent, put together, pretty, a woman who hasn't lost herself in the process of becoming a wife and a mother. Whenever I try to look the part it always seems to lead to trying to hard + clothes throwing, bad hair, a few tears and regret for having not kept up with my most-fit-self-of-15-years-ago. To add insult to injury, I tried to direct the whole photo shoot resulting in a family photo that would have been the perfect poster title "Why you should not try to direct your own grocery store photo appointment. Really, it's a terrible idea". On a nice note, we ended up purchasing a very cute photo of our daughter sitting alone in a little chair, playing with one of the puzzles from the play area. It reminds me of how cute she was at that age and that I shouldn't try too hard. I digress. So, the heels and the mockery. Yes, I'm a terrible high heel walker, even if the heel is not high (1.5" to be exact). In fact, I've realized that I most likely resemble a CONSTIPATED CHICKEN while trying to walk in high heels, so it fits the theme of this post.

I started looking around the net as I was cleaning out my shoe collection and came across this tutorial - How to Walk in Heels & Stilettos =P. You know what? It's helped me. I like Wendy from Wendy's Look Book and since I'm rapidly starting to resemble a [INSERT SPORT OF CHOICE HERE] MOM, I'll take any help I can get. Until then I'll continue to carry a backup pair of shoes whenever I attempt a heel.

C) My maternity leave is coming to and end. I've been putting off making those kind of calls because I'M SCARED (AKA CHICKEN) of being rejected and was hoping a part time job would fall into my lap that gave me weekends, evenings and holidays off, wasn't too stressful and was close to home.

So far the only thing that has fallen into my lap that resembles some of my past employment experiences was some of the fouled water I scooped out of the future pool fouler's baby's bathtub tonight and into the toilet. 

TO THE CHICKEN. The bird my Grandma always said she felt sorry for, for having to lay all of those eggs day in and day out.

WHAT TO DO WITH  4 KILOGRAMS, OR 8.8184905 POUNDS, OF PARTIALLY FROZEN CHICKEN BREASTS

• Boil the mostly frozen ones for a while.
• Place the others in various baking dishes, drizzle with olive oil + spices (I used onion powder, garlic salt and paprika for one batch, Cajun spices for another, Jamaican spice mix for the third and made the last one plain) - bake at 350º F for as long as it takes to cook.
• Transfer boiled chicken to a baking dish, if you like, drizzle with olive oil and bake until they look more appetizing (just saying).
• Freeze chicken on baking sheets and write yourself a note (put it somewhere obvious - bathroom mirror?) to remind you to transfer the chicken to proper freezer bags/wrap in tin foil or butcher's paper.
• Congratulate yourself for making it work and for having some go to meals in the freezer (just add veggies/whatever)...maybe forgetting to leave the chicken out wasn't such a bad thing after all!